Of the raging distortion and the best of you.

I’ve got another confession to make
I’m your fool
Everyone’s got their chains to break
Holdin’ you

Were you born to resist or be abused?
Is someone getting the best, the best, the best, the best of you?
Is someone getting the best, the best, the best, the best of you?

Are you gone and onto someone new?
I needed somewhere to hang my head
Without your noose
You gave me something that I didn’t have
But had no use
I was too weak to give in
Too strong to lose
My heart is under arrest again
But I break loose
My head is giving me life or death
But I can’t choose
I swear I’ll never give in
I refuse

Is someone getting the best, the best, the best, the best of you?
Is someone getting the best, the best, the best, the best of you?
Has someone taken your faith?
Its real, the pain you feel
You trust, you must
Confess
Is someone getting the best, the best, the best, the best of you?
Oh…

Oh…Oh…Oh…Oh…

Has someone taken your faith?
Its real, the pain you feel
The life, the love you’d die to heal
The hope that starts the broken hearts
You trust, you must
Confess

Is someone getting the best, the best, the best, the best of you?
Is someone getting the best, the best, the best, the best of you?

I’ve got another confession my friend
I’m no fool
I’m getting tired of starting again
Somewhere new

Were you born to resist or be abused?
I swear I’ll never give in
I refuse

Is someone getting the best, the best, the best, the best of you?
Is someone getting the best, the best, the best, the best of you?
Has someone taken your faith?
Its real, the pain you feel
You trust, you must
Confess
Is someone getting the best, the best, the best, the best of you?
Oh…

-Best of you
Foo fighters

Thanks Leona! =)

 

Now there we go.

Found it!

Here we are! =D

 

This is called a rest.

Break for a while i guess.
Need this fast to find strength.

and be that man God wants me to be.

a strong one.

So stay tune, i’ll be right back.

———————————————

But then again, it was 500 days for them.

95 days for me.

heh. really huh.

- Anonymous.

 

Glorious Morning, Surreal skies and your ocean eyes.

 

What i’ve needed.

 

Hands shivering, but it’s okay.

Photo @Philip Gan

Beauty is not only a terrible thing, it is also a mysterious thing. Where God and the devil strive for mastery, and the battlegound is the heart of Men.

- Fydor Dostoyevsky

well said. i would say.

I want to be wild at heart
I want big adventures to live for
I want to have a beauty to rescue

Wild at heart
Big dreams and hopes that i’m dying to fight for it. having days spend traveling the world, touring gigs/concerts.
That’s my dream at least.
I think all guys are born with that. the “I wanna head out and be that” attitude.

Living a little bit more dangerously today.

Starts today.

—————————————————————-

Big adventures
“Does it have to start with a broken heart, broken dreams with bleeding parts.”

I guess it does.  it takes a big God to have big adventures.

Starts today.

—————————————————————

Beauty to rescue
I want to be the first one to say “hey.. Everything’s gonna be alright.”
To say “you look really pretty today”
To see the world behind your eyes.
To be on an adventure with you.

To pursue, fight for.
I want to fight for you.

Will i be able to? can i pull it off? Can i make it at all? Can i do it at all?
If i went by my track record today.
i know that it and i  would not be good enough.

but i’m here.
offering my strength.
I’ve decided and i’m here. strength.

Can i fight for you? i’m hanging on.

Starts today and will continue on.

—————————————————————–

If time was never on my side.
Then before i die, i wanna burn out bright.

Keeps me hanging on, so contagiously.

 

We fear, we fall, we lose control.

“Courage is not the absence of fear, but rather the judgment that something else is more important than fear.” – Ambrose Redmoon

 

I’ll call front and i’ll take the first shot.

Fight

Definition: Strength or disposition for fighting; pugnacity; as, he has a great deal of fight in him. 

 

boys grow up “fighting“, believe or not.
i spent most of my childhood imagining i was in a war, would make solid “guns” out of Lego. 
days hiding the garden, dodging imaginary bullets. having to rescue a damsel in distress. 

Despite having been shot down, you refuse to surrender.
Despite having surrounded by enemies, you keep fighting on. 
you don’t give up. YOU NEVER GIVE UP. 
I can remember so clearly of having friends over at the playground opposite my place, having water-gun battles.

it’s not really a “KiaSu” thing but no one wanted to admit surrender despite being soak over and over again by the water-guns.
i guess it’s because we wanted to stay in the game, we wanted to keep on fighting. 

it all i guess prepared us guys on the road to become fighters. 

 

at the end of it all, you’d stand tall and be the hero. 
i guess “fight” is what make guys, rather guys. 

The Question is now if fight is what make guys, guys. then:

What are we fighting for?

I’ve chose to fight for dreams.

I’ve chose to fight hard.

I’ll fight for you if you want me to. but i’ve chose to do so.

 

fight ¹⁶

Definition: exert oneself continuously, vigorously, engage in a crusade for a certain cause or person;

 

I chose to be that way.

Here am i at the cross roads
Which one should i take?
the wide or the narrow?
the deep or the shallow?

-Daze
FourLetterStory

“i’ve picked the  narrow road, the one which has no comfort and you’re led to just rely. just believe. just trust in what God is doing”

Honestly, i’m scared.
Having to make a decision and having to follow through.
Thats something you can say, it’s really Christ like. You don’t see Jesus just decided to stop going to the cross and say
“hey, you know what it’s just too hard and painful. i’ll turn back now.”

and i’m glad He din’t.

and He handled it well.

But if it takes having to live for that one bigger purpose and willing to just fight for it.

i’ll do it.

so here we go……

—————————————————————————————–

Funny how you can sit across all you ever dream and hope for.

and still fumble on words.
Like how it goes.

“The perfect words never cross my mind and there was nothing in there but you.”
Sounds silly i know.

maybe i am silly. heh.

 

Thank you.

Thank you for speaking into my life and just looking out for me.
Thank you for standing up and told me.

“Benji, i want you to give yourself a chance.”

Never again will I fear myself
All of the things I couldn’t change can rest
Never again will my heart turn away from you

-Never again

I think thats what i needed to hear.

Thank you
And thank you “The Big Guy”

 

Hello there.

Hello and good bye to the half of 2009.

Moments when i stood tall, moments when you crashed and burn.
of Albums made, and of songs abandon.
of Tour buses, and of arriving back from tours tired on wees of hours of the morning.
of new friends made along the way, and of say goodbyes in the midst of a reunion.

of being confident, and of being real afriad.
of nights of real good rest, and of sleepless nights.
Of Digiracks and of MacPros.

of ecstasy when being around you, and of the echo of your voice.

I.

Surrender.